Here are some great (light-hearted) helpful, to-the-point tips that will hopefully guide you on your journey to the altar.
For starters, your wedding is a production! Your obligation is to put on a show that will impress the women. The men will appreciate your work and effort, but the reality is, give the women a good show and your wedding will be a success!
Secondly, a lack of planning will guarantee unwanted failure. So plan, plan, plan for every detail and keep a detailed checklist. Here is a link for some great checklist lists. etc. http://www.weddingdetails.com/. The more months you have to plan, the more options you have for everything, including some room to re-negotiate with certain vendors.
Remember to rely on me for suggestions for wedding locations, restaurants, photographers, etc. I am here to assist you in planning your stress free wedding.
When planning the date consider:
- The weather, the weather, the weather (did I say weather?). I can’t stress this one enough. Always have "plan B" should the weather change last minute on your wedding day.
- Make sure that the most important people do not have scheduled commitments for that day that they cannot change.
- Investigate if there will be a huge event in your town that may interfere with traffic patterns around your wedding location or reception. Always consider the parking situation. No guest enjoys a long hike to your wedding ceremony especially when carrying your (hopefully) very large wedding gift.
- Check for holidays. Sometimes they may interfere with air travel or transportation for your out of town guests. If a number of relatives and friends have to fly in, check with some local hotels or motels as far as a group rates for those dates and let people know right away.
If planning a beachside wedding, make sure to click on the link below to check for tide charts. Some of our beaches will be partially under water at high tide and this can really put a "damper" on your wedding day. You might want to plan your wedding ceremony around low tide to avoid any disappointments, so, plan, plan ahead! Here's the link:
http://www.saltwatertides.com/dynamic.dir/californiasites.html
Get specific contracts with your vendors - bands, DJ, florists, caterers, and bakery - have everything in writing. And ask for hidden costs that could be charged to you such as traveling, over time, sales tax. Insist on all the details in the contract. Remember that there is always room for negotiating.
Now that I've touched on this topic, when negotiating with your wedding photographer, specify that you want a very efficient picture-taking schedule. Your guests will wait patiently for the photography to be finished. Also, remember that your caterer at the reception hall is depending on you sticking to your schedule to show up so that food will be at its peak. I know from experience, your guests will not enjoy cold food (unless sushi is the main entree).
When planning your ceremony, please don't fall into excess: such as, too many voice solos, speeches or poems. Your emotions will sneak up on you. Nine out of 10 couples will blubber uncontrollably at the moment they are under pressure to face each other and perform. I try to keep my ceremonies no longer than twenty to thirty minutes to avoid any of the above because you might make me blubber too (just kidding).
Weigh the cuteness factor when considering using children in the ceremony under the age of five. They have small attention spans and become bored easily. I usually have them sit down after the procession.
Make sure the groom has some involvement in the planning. This is very important! You never know, his imput might make sense. However, just between us girls, we always have the ultimate say-so.
Understand that this wedding is also the joining of two entire families. If you are different in religion, background or culture, celebrate each side's uniqueness and emphasize the things you have in common - love for the bride and groom, for instance.
Tactfully make sure the mothers understand that this is your wedding. If you have reached a sticking point, just back off a bit. Where possible, give in on some detail if it would make you happier to see your mother's satisfaction than to get your own way. But, if it's something that you absolutely have your own heart set on, we encourage you to cry uncontrollably until you get your own way.
For the day of the wedding, the bride should have an emergency kit packed for the wedding ceremony and reception. An emergency pair of this and that, safety pins, sewing kit, two-sided white tape, "monthly" necessities, and lots of tissue for those emotional moments.
When it comes to planning your bachelorette and bachelor party, discuss your feelings with each other. Agree not to do things that will get you off on the wrong foot and leave you with a feeling of insecurity. Just trust each other and give yourself a little space since this will be your last whirl as a bachelorette and bachelor. Go off and have a great time...you've certainly earned it!
Don't plan to leave on your honeymoon immediately since both of you will be extremely exhausted right after the wedding. Wait a day or two, open gifts, sleep in late, slow down and rest before you pack and take off on your honeymoon. Just enjoy being newlyweds! I usually recommend a "mini-moon" before the wedding to let off steam so you feel refreshed on your wedding day.
Now, go and enjoy the planning of your beautiful wedding celebration and keep your emotions and flare ups under control at all times!
To wrap it up, use patience, plan-plan-plan, write it down, get the details, rely on me, divide work into teams, compromise where needed, give yourself months and months to organize, and enjoy the planning process itself. And never assume anything. Check, and double check for all details and possible snags and emergencies. Plan on how you will cope and overcome any unforeseen emergencies…they just might happen.
"Eight letters,
three words,
one meaning,
I Love You"
